My Girly Ways http://ping.fm/1JM1H
poniedziałek, 27 grudnia 2010
niedziela, 26 grudnia 2010
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Ask me anything you want. Anything goes. I will respond within 48 hour or faster. http://formspring.me/agquarx
Anger management 101. Some count to 10, some visualize putting their anger in a virtual balloon and let it up, up and away.. What's your recipe, ritual, way to deal with anger?
I reason with it until it disapears in puff of logic. Why are u angry? I insist. I use reason with deadly precision.
For someone who hasn't read Dune; how would you "sell it" to me, so I would become interested? "What's in it for me?" [you don't know, you only know what's in it for you, but you catch my drift]
It quotes a lot of Bible and the main character becomes a prophet. A real one. Only of different religion. But not VERY different :-) Did my pitch work?
Besides using tarot, do you use any other ways of interpreting symbols for divination?
I discovered or rather found out that random songs work very good sometimes. And 20-sided dice. Mine is green, but that's not what makes it work, I'm sure :-)
środa, 15 grudnia 2010
Synthesis of 6- and 7-propargyloxy derivatives of 4-(3-fluoroanilino)-quinazoline http://ping.fm/v4UT6
arguably, the word "explosive" is autological if you form it out of sticks of tnt. the only problem is, WHO'S GOIN... http://ping.fm/hrv6Z
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ Ginger►red►YOU @agquarx ..your voice is in the air, i can't feel an ending.. everywhere, a ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~zoldc
wtorek, 14 grudnia 2010
poniedziałek, 13 grudnia 2010
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Ask me anything you want. Anything goes. I will respond within 48 hour or faster. http://formspring.me/agquarx
WikiLeaks. Good thing happening to promote transparency in communication? Or a threat to global safety?
I'm for total transparency. Information wants to be free. If we haven't got Wikileaks, we'd have to invent them. It's just a law of nature or Internet. Information wants to be free! Hack the planet!
What do you think of full-electric cars, like the Chevrolet Volt? Can they contribute to solve environmental problems?
Yes. It is easier to control carbon emissions at concentrated places like electrical plants than in every single vehicle. Plus, better air in cities! :-]
Do you listen to internet radio stations? I don't mean Blip.FM, Last.FM, etc. where you can influence the streaming music, but "old school" radio gone online, like http://www.thebuzz.com/main.html or http://www.sfera.umk.pl/ ? Any favorites?
No, I am entirely spoiled by internet radio that knows what your preferences are, like Pandora or Last.fm :-].
Do you have Closterkeller music files and would you share them with me?
Of course, I will gladly do so! :-) Just tell me where to upload them! :-))))))))) Kisses!
niedziela, 12 grudnia 2010
czwartek, 9 grudnia 2010
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Ask me anything you want. Really. I will respond within 48 hours or faster. http://formspring.me/agquarx
Do you like chewing gum? If so, what's your favorite brand and flavor?
I absolutely can't stand chewing gum and watching other people chew it either.
Do you like chocolate? If so, what's your favorite brand and flavor?
I don't like chocolade. Really.
Do you like soda pops/carbonated flavored sweetened water drinks? If so, what's your favorite brand and flavor?
CocaCole. Sorry for being less than original in my answer ;-] I don't drink such drinks often though. They make you phat ;-]
Do you like coffee? If so, what's your favorite brand and flavor?
I don't like coffee. If I drink it, I don't care which brand it is, it will taste awful anyway ;-]
wtorek, 7 grudnia 2010
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poniedziałek, 6 grudnia 2010
What TV show do you wish would go off the air for good?
Various "Dancing with Stars" ripoffs and the original even before it was created.
Do you have a faith or life philosophy and does it make you do daily rituals like prayer, meditation or offering?
No. It doesn't *DO* me to do anything. ASTARTE IS A GODDESS FREE. She is not just another goddess, promising love and all loving Universe. She is special to me because she doesn't need or want my worship. I worship her because I like to do it and it brings me good, love and all loving Universe :-].
How would you define what you refer to as reality realized? I.a.w. how is it different from other realities, consciousness levels, viewpoints, experiences? Or am I taking this too far now?
"Reality", in other words all the things that are, MUST exist also without you. "Reality realized" MUST NOT exist in other way than with you, together. HTH :-]
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ I felt drawn to Drew Barrymore this morning – I'm a Dreamer" - I possitively adore her :-) ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~zd17d
Monogamy, monotheism. Is there a link? Does monotheism by default dictate monogamy as the sole acceptable m/f lifelong relationship?
Generally, Yes. That's why it's EVIL :-)
Where does the need for a personal god come from? Jahweh, Allah, Astarte? Why can’t we see the universe as one big interconnected being which by it’s omni presence will automatically take the best care of us? Without having to worship?
Because we are often POISONED by memetic poisons in form of "sacred books", often when we are very susceptible to manipulation - when grieved, in fear or when very young. It's evil.
sobota, 4 grudnia 2010
In your opinion, are there any issues or scenarios where government bodies may restrict or regulate your personal freedom, with the object to protect you from harming yourself? I’m thinking of drug use, euthanasia, mental health degradation.
No. I don't think they should be able to imprison me just because it's for my own good. If I want to suffer, I WANT TO SUFFER. ME.
When did you have your first ever recreational drug use experience, which substance did you use and what was it like?
It was alcohol. In form of vodka with tonic. On an "impreza" with friends. I became stupid and avoided alcohol since that day.
środa, 1 grudnia 2010
wtorek, 30 listopada 2010
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what you are seeing is a picture of a t-rex torn precisely between fighting crime and selling vitamin d pills for p... http://ping.fm/xniRS
Do you think insomnia could be caused by spiritual activity in unseen dimensions around us?
No. Yes. Maybe. If you care about this activity, maybe it can cause you being unable to sleep at night. If you mind, stop caring and see if it helps. If you don't mind, why would you ask this question? Consider your reason, because it gives an answer to the real question you wanted to ask, but hid it in this question. Mu!
How to make my auntie and uncle stay be less narrow-minded than now? They watch TV all the time from morning to midnight. There are any ways to do anything with that?
It's better if you start the change from modifying environment you can really affect, that is, yourself. Why do you mind? Ask yourself this question. If you have a good reason, try arguing with yourself, that it's not a good one and then you will transcend to enlightenment in very much zen way, young Padawan.
Your publishings on the web show a contrast between strong belief in visions, demons &deities on the left side &an almost anticlimax-like realization on the right side that none of it is true. I would despair, you seem to have transcended that. How?
I simply never believe in things I read and believe in everything I am told, then write that down and read it. It works :-) Really! And I guess I am simply myself. I can believe or know several things that are mutually exclusive. I'm not confused by ambiguity.
What does writing poetry do for you, like, does if have a function in your life, could you do without it, or definitely not?
I write poems because I love to do it, like eating good food or listening to music. But they require special state of mind for me to enjoy writing them full. I love when people comment on my micropoems on Twitter. Comment about some if you want to make me all happy :-)
Were you able to or allowed to listen to music as much as you liked when you were in mental hospital?
Yes. I took my iPod with me and the charger. Thank you for asking. I rented the iPod to people there, they are so starved for music, you have no idea. They loved me for it, I think. And I'm happy I was able to make their status less painful. Music is a truly magickal entity.
Demons. Created by religions to repress our free thought and taking our own responsibility and thus absorbed by the collective consciousness as evil doers? Or real existing entities? Or character traits that can haunt as well as inspire us?
Demons are real. But you needed to be afraid of USING them, they can be just a tool for your understanding. They are not people, though. Let's not use the word demons when we think character traits. Why confuse ourselves and people around. I like the reaction of people of religions of the book (Christians, Jews, Mahometan). They are scared of demons. They shouldn't. It's like working with radioactive materials - if you take precautions and think about the things you do, you'll generally be fine. HTH :-)
With you last high dosage MDPV experience, you were found in a state of having no connection with your surroundings anymore; do you have any memories of the time you were found and rushed to hospital?
I have all memory from this period. No amnesia at all. MDPV is stimulating pleasure centers in the brain (indirectly), it's not a dissociative like Ketamine or DXM. I know it from literature and from my own experience, I tried those two too. Read about phenetylamines on english Wikipedia.
Was it bliss when you were out on so much MDPV or was it hell? Did you try to reconnect to your surroundings but could not, or did you not care at that time?
I was not disconnected, MDPV doesn't work that way. I was more connected than it is possible for me when sober. So connected that every twitch of some muscle in my body engrossed me in ocean of feelings. That is mostly what it did appear to me - a lot of feelings, mostly carnal type and almost no reason to hold me back. I'd use it again if I only have a chance. It's actually better than cocaine. Dangerous drug. You should try it, you'd be lost in it and maybe did something very bad. I survived because reason is less important for me than intuition, which was unimpaired.
Do you recall the process of coming down from so much MDPV and reconnect with your surroundings?
I was extremely talkative, even though I was tied to bed in a straight jacket I didn't mind, because the drug was still working. I enjoyed this captivity. Then I started to get those dreams, that I use MDPV and have sex with multiple parties, violent, crazy sex. I was dreaming awake for few days. In these dreams I actually felt the same thing - extremely horny attitude without any inhibitions, really. No inhibitions is a key to sexual enjoyment, I think. Also, my sleep patterns were grisly disturbed, but that is to be expected when you abuse MDPV. Even in smaller doses it damages your nights' sleep.
Has this latest experience on high MDPV dosage upset you as much as your Salamander experience, when you ingested cocaine for the first time, lost control and had unprotected sex with multiple party attendants?
Funny, it did not. I guess there is some difference between the two substances in how they affect memory and emotional response directed by recall. Maybe there is also something to say about the social setting - I was alone with my shent. Nobody except me and you know. There ;-)
poniedziałek, 29 listopada 2010
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ Come see the blood that's in my bed, come hear the things that nobody talks about..... ♫ http://blip.fm/~z3sy9
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ Addiction, can't get away from you.. Use me, bite me, shock me.. @agquarx ▲ Shocker X - Las... ♫ http://blip.fm/~z3sre
niedziela, 28 listopada 2010
sobota, 27 listopada 2010
piątek, 26 listopada 2010
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ Inspired by the priestess of Warsaw.. @agquarx ▲ Blondie - Atomic" ♫ http://blip.fm/~z0ql3
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ To express my happinez you've been released from hospital.. @agquarx ▲ May Goddess bless th... ♫ http://blip.fm/~z0j5p
@IRiDEscent_ERiS - I used the offering to get sth. I hope Astarte did sth for you? Did she? Lately? I was asking... ♫ http://blip.fm/~z0bwg
95895d1229374265-funny-strange-random-pics-24mcj1g.jpg (JPEG Image, 500×667 pixels) http://ping.fm/PhNFn
środa, 24 listopada 2010
piątek, 19 listopada 2010
czwartek, 18 listopada 2010
poniedziałek, 15 listopada 2010
i've been saying "new autobiography title" after my friends say something particularly great, which is how joey com... http://ping.fm/Z5Fq7
niedziela, 14 listopada 2010
What in your opinion are the most important character traits in men? I mean if you will choose some man to be with him, how he should to be? ;-)
Helvetica character traits are perfect.
You said, that Fearies care about our friendships, I mean we will never be alone because they give to us friends into our life. How it works?
Ask your faeries. If you INSIST long enough you will get an answer. Maybe your faeries do it think different than my faeries, you know :-)
What for someone create Catholicism, Muslim, Eastern Orthodox Church if do you think that god doesn't exist? Is it for controling people, or what for?
Yes. It's also pure EVIL. I thought everybody knew it's Satan who created organized religion...No joke.
I like Dropbox. It's not only sexy but actually truly useful. If you use this link, I get some free space there. http://ping.fm/RXHtw
formspring.me
Ask me anything you want. Anything goes. I will respond within 48 hour or faster. http://formspring.me/agquarx
Is intuition a quality that can be trained? If so, how?
I have no idea - I train my intuition by intuition. No joke.
If I don't want to watch (manipulated) TV news, what would be good alternative news channels?
Use some kind of RSS aggregator (Google Reader is very nice) to automatically feed yourself interesting content from many, varied sources. GR even suggests new sources based on existing ones. I like it. Maybe you will like it too. I like automation generally :-)
How do I remove the scar tissue of religious based guilt?
I never had this problem really. I'm afraid I don't know much about it. One thing is sure - using beliefs against each other to nullify them is a good idea. Once you get rid of dogma the rest is not going to be so destructive and painful to live with.
sobota, 13 listopada 2010
czwartek, 11 listopada 2010
Slipped a blow / Bleeding for me / You in control / Couldn't believe / Master of pain / Hidden beliefs / No love... ♫ http://blip.fm/~ygv2n
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ You're so beautiful.. @agquarx ▲ Juliette and the Licks – You're Speaking My Language" ♫ http://blip.fm/~ygmvx
środa, 10 listopada 2010
@arthurpaul: "rb @IRiDEscent_ERiS: "@agquarx ▲ Anneke van Giersbergen & Sharon den Adel @ Melkweg Amsterdam 12-0... ♫ http://blip.fm/~yfbhi
niedziela, 7 listopada 2010
środa, 3 listopada 2010
poniedziałek, 1 listopada 2010
piątek, 29 października 2010
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "@JadedKittyKimiko: ""Your mouth blooms like a cut, sweet and full of sin"" @agquarx" ♫ http://blip.fm/~xzlhi
środa, 27 października 2010
@ReflectionSymmetry I feel wee need / I construct sentry / Don't come to me / Weight random entry / Event of hid... ♫ http://blip.fm/~xx2dk
niedziela, 24 października 2010
środa, 13 października 2010
@IRiDEscent_ERiS I listen to it whenver I feel like there is no reason to continue and I stop, just like that. I... ♫ http://blip.fm/~xcql7
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ I'm dating ancient ghosts, the ones I made friends with.. @agquarx ▲ The Cardigans - 03:45 ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~xcqfd
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ I'm still following the pain.. You hold the key of what I need, unlock the door that will @... ♫ http://blip.fm/~xcqer
@DescendingDown Cold is the air in this darkness / Black are my army laced boots / Today I didn't sleep nor rest... ♫ http://blip.fm/~xcjdi
@DescendingDown I make up for absence of your hips / I touch myself like you would like to / I think about your ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~xc3mn
wtorek, 12 października 2010
formspring.me
Ask me anything you want. Anything goes. I will respond within 48 hour or faster. http://formspring.me/agquarx
formspring.me
Ask me anything you want. Anything goes. I will respond within 48 hour or faster. http://formspring.me/agquarx
formspring.me
Ask me anything you want. Anything goes. I will respond within 48 hour or faster. http://formspring.me/agquarx
How long was the longest period of time ever that you have been awake? And how long was the longest you ever slept for?
It is hard sometimes to tell if you are not having micro sleep episodes, when you try to stay awake using stimulant drugs for extended periods of time. Reality becomes suddenly not so much different from the dream space, for some reason you'd rather not know about. Anxiety generated by worries about madness is common. Sometimes you are just not sure, especially after first three to four days without sleep. You test the reality however you can. If you still feel like you care, that is. The longest period without sleep for me is two weeks. I never slept longer than a day.
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼ Suzanne Vega – Stay Awake @agquarx You're going to hit a new personal record..." ♫ http://blip.fm/~xbgsy
What is the difference between bipolar disorder, schizophrenic disorder and multi personality? The strength of personages or more?
Please read carefully and compare them for yourself: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multiple_personality_disorder, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bipolar_disorder, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizophrenia
Can you describe from an insider's experience what it is like to go through a psychosis? Is it like a bad drug trip?
It is not always an experience alike hell. Sometimes it is more like heaven. But always when it ends, you feel cheated of your life by evil disease that lied to you so you believe truly and with all your soul in good and evil spirits and higher truths and then told you she is really lying and nothing of what you've known and loved for all this time with all your being is true at all and it's all just crap and void and emptiness of despair.
How do I make a strong password?
Make sure you are not using any word that can be found in a dictionary, nor it's reverse. Never use anything that can be deduced from your profile or easily guessed. 12-15 characters should be OK for most cases. Choose them randomly (use a tool maybe or dice) from an unordered set of lower case, upper case letters and symbols and punctuation. If you follow this recipe, you will make a very strong password. Remember to change your password periodically, for example every three months if your server might be regularly attacked. Make sure that at least last five passwords are not repeated, preferably by setting the operating system to remember it for you, so you don't have to. And don't forget your password! Use some kind of password manager or something :-). LastPass is good and free.
When going through a bad period in your disorder, how do you manage to stay focussed on the knowledge that it will pass and get better again?
My imaginary friends helped me a lot. Even if I don't really believe in their existance. Friends like LUCYFAIR, Astarte, others.
Someone I know has schizophrenic disorder and is always very low in energy. He has to really calculate when and where to use his energy. Small physical duties are very tiring to him. Do you (have to) plan your energy use?
Yes. I try to avoid any needless or excess energy expenditure.
Correct me if I'm wrong; with your disorder I imagine your emotions must be like a roller coaster ride; how do you manage to stay consistent to the outside world?
I just trust my body. It is a very good anchor.
How do medical drugs help you to function better? Can you give an example of how you would function w/ or w/o meds? In a certain situation?
I'm not really sure. I don't remember how I feel without drugs, because I was taking drugs all the time for the last 10 years.
Is medication in schizophrenic disorder primarily aimed at preventing psychosis?
Yes, it is also meant to help alleviate the so called negative symptoms of schizophrenia.
poniedziałek, 11 października 2010
How does a person with bipolar or schizophrenia keep their different personalities in check?
It comes with practice. First, there are drugs, they help. Then, there should be talk therapy, but I don't believe in it, so I don't use it. I try to stay in touch with reality realized by staying in touch with my body. I think about myself as "we", not "I". I accept my multiplicity. This way I am not afraid of it. So I can control it, with it's agreement.
(what) do you like (about) Christmas?
Nothing. When I was younger, I liked the presents. Now? Nothing
niedziela, 10 października 2010
wtorek, 5 października 2010
Do you belive that we can make our dream real?
Yes, if we plan accordingly and things happen to our benefit. Things just happen, you know
What kind of cat is Jarema? Fur colour, character, etc.
He is large (9KG), silver with red accents, looks a lot like tiger :-). He is rather shy, but loves me very much and follows me when I move to other part of apartment, so he can beg for some massage ;-). He has the cutest buzz you have ever encountered, low and masculine :-).
@IRiDEscent_ERiS: "☼Electrical current hallowed be thy name, lift my emotions and banish all my shame...... ♫ http://blip.fm/~x1b64
What does being a wytch add to your worldview or sense of spirituality that is unique and “not accessible” thru major world religions?
As a wytch I have special powers, of course. My intuition is so heightened that I can use it instead of pure reason. Magickal beings talk to me freely. I cast love spells hither and dither...As to worldview - I became a wytch after a revelation of Last Child of Gaia in a dream I was telling you about I think. I am in love with Mother Earth. I can't stand people who tell me that this life is meaningless comparing with life after death. Wytches know there is none. I have never seen a spirit from the dead and I'm not expecting to. Whole afterlife is a bunch of bullshit that only makes people care less about each other and our planet. I hate organized religions for creating this harmful illusion. People that mourn their dead know that there is nothing on the other side, I think, deep in their hearts, even if they say otherwise. Or they wouldn't mourn.
Do individual humans go thru their life experiences mainly to learn lessons for themselves, or for the whole of mankind to evolve as a species, by sharing their experiences?
You surely fancy dualism ;-) Didn't I tell you every dualism is false? ;-) Individual humans learn for themselves, but they are not alone - they talk to others about those experiences in many ways, like books or fireside stories, thus enabling the resonance of dissonance of the symbol clouds emerging in their minds as a result of those experiences. We are symbol processing entities, we cannot help but to process symbols. To quote Pink Floyd: "Keep talking" :-)
Do you believe mankind will evolve to a higher state of consciousness, so we will finally lose the drive to manipulate and kill for control of resources? Will love conquer?
No, I don't think so. We will control ourselves, sure, but as material beings we simply HAVE to use material resources. That's how life is - it decreases it's own entropy at the cost of increasing the entropy of the world around it...
What’s more important in your life: being a priestess of Astarte or being a wytch, or do those two blend into one?
Being a priestess of Astarte is more important to me.
Are we all seperate individual beings or One Being expressed through myriads of individuals?
Neither. We are separate individuals (that is what an individual **is**, "a separate entity"), but we are connected by relations in-between that modify by emergency existence of properties of each of us, so it comes out LIKE we were a bigger thing in some sense, which we are, kind-of, because we are IN the big and pretty and young Universe who has no OUT-side, by definition of Universe. She cannot have the out-side or we are not connected by relations in-between and we are connected or cause and effect don't exist (some disagree with their existence and I sometimes agree with them ;-)) AND our properties (the way we compare things so we can see they are LIKE other things) would be absolute not emergent and they are not absolute, which can be observed by looking at the Universe. This only talks about our properties, not essence, if any. I don't believe in essence, personally. It remains to be discussed. This is not based only in pure logic, but also multiple systematical empirical observations, not just by me of course, I can read, thank you ;-). She is definitely NOT human, but she is alive and in this sense LIKE us. LIKENESS IS NOT EQUIVALENCE. Map is not the territory. Every dualism is false. We are alive, therefore she must be alive or we are not really alive. Ignore popular "old school" definition of "alive" because it is widely disputed. So, neither answer :-). Very Discordian, you must agree, but unintentionally so :-). HAIL ERIS! ALL HAIL DISCORDIA!
poniedziałek, 4 października 2010
Czy przyjaźń i miłość, mogą iść ze sobą w parze? Czy wzajemnie się wykluczają?
Absolutnie się nie wykluczają. Miłość bez przyjaźni to piekło zazdrości. Przyjaźń bez miłości jest możliwa chyba tylko między komputerami.
how you doooooin ;)
I'm so emo today. I need to write a huge entry in my bloguś. Maybe someone will comment and I won't need to cut myself again...
sobota, 2 października 2010
piątek, 1 października 2010
czwartek, 30 września 2010
My education: kindergarten 1963-1965, prime school: 1965-1971, secondary school: 1971-1977. Afraid of university, student culture loneliness I chose to work 1977-today. What's your education?
About six years of university education on different facilities, but never finished anything.
HD or flash memory?
I'm not sure...Solid state disks are nice, but I'm a bit afraid to use them, they are not as proven as HD. And pricey. I guess, HD, and lots of backups.
Do you have a system in place that, when you suddenly decease, will tell online friends that you are gone? So online friends do not worry what the bleep happened when you show no more signs of life?
No, but that's interesting. Could prove to be useful... Do you know any web service that provides something like that or do I have to write it myself?
@MirrormE: "Holland's answer to Lady Gaga ♥ Susanna Kay – Off the Hook - (Official Music Video)" ♫ http://blip.fm/~wujky
@femmetal: "Lorraine Rath and Jessica Way are so dreamy. So's their music!" ♫ http://blip.fm/~wuj6u
wtorek, 28 września 2010
@theNetherest It's us, the salt of the land, from the poor districts and the hell growed over, hey, you will nev... ♫ http://blip.fm/~wrfq6
poniedziałek, 27 września 2010
anyone who says they never tell a lie is lying to themselves at a preconscious level as their brain delays and misr... http://ping.fm/NpxiL
@DiCE_of_ERiS And she'll enter your puny dream // Concealed in a mourning veil // Change is the only thing real ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~wq98w
poniedziałek, 20 września 2010
sobota, 18 września 2010
piątek, 17 września 2010
Some say playing and cherishing emo music will keep me in bondage recycling my pain and never getting away from it. What do you think?
I think they are morons who don't know s*t about #emo and music in general. Sad music doesn't make you sad by default, it depends on your constitution. Tell them to sod off and ask me again if they say something like that :-)
środa, 15 września 2010
Songs sung in English cut me a little less deep than songs sung in my mothertongue Dutch. (Dutch hits me too hard, is maybe why I don't like songs in Dutch) How is that for you, English compared to Polish? Or compared to Russian even?
For me English is as powerful or sometimes even more powerful than Polish. It really depends on the lyrics for me and most important - how music is playing with the lyrics, there is no difference because of language type at least for those two languages. I know a lot more songs sung in English that I care about though. Maybe Polish musicians suck ;-)
piątek, 10 września 2010
@erisian_agquarx_feeder: "She is the night, stars in her hair, stop being blind, wake up and stare!" ♥ Astarte- ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vzsfb
@erisian_agquarx_feeder: twitassoc Take my hand, let me take you to some other land...Cranberries ♥ Kemopetrol ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vzsb4
środa, 8 września 2010
wtorek, 7 września 2010
poniedziałek, 6 września 2010
I find myself rather dependent on other people's moods and opinions. How do I change to be a stable individual with a core of self-confidence and self-love that others can't touch?
You asking that questions shows that you have deeper problems. A question always reveals part of the answer and tells you something true about the questioner. Your question partially "diagnoses" you, just don't think you are not normal ;-). First, try imagining your various personalities, give them names (and keep to them), imagine how they look, try talking to them. Try differentiate which thoughts are yours and which are of theirs. Then, after a while, when they are strong, REALIZE that they are just you. Tell yourself that, against that feeling that they are separate. After all, nothing comes from nothing - they MUST originate in you, because you only meet them in your own head. And drugs. Drugs will certainly help to change your attitude. Take drugs that stimulate dopamine and nor-epinephrine, like cocaine or meth ;-).
@RedheadAlert_feeding_agquarx: "I LOVE this song, I always send it to people who demand pictures of me before th... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vth20
niedziela, 5 września 2010
sobota, 4 września 2010
@RedheadAlert_feeding_agquarx: "I feel like this today / It's going to go away / Can't talk to you / Nothing to ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vqyza
@RedheadAlert_feeding_agquarx: I am trying to break myself out of this misery... ♥ Nina Hagen– TV Glotzer [couch... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vquy0
środa, 1 września 2010
@RedheadAlert: "☼ When I feel down I want you above me.. You're the sun who makes me shine.. ♥ Divinyls - I Touc... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vm033
@theNetherest So, you liked that unfinished erotic story? The heat from sands of the Desert? :-) Should I finish... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vlp4j
@theNetherest @notadjman The world is ours, our own to capture...my love... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vlp33
wtorek, 31 sierpnia 2010
If your house was on fire and you could only grab three things, what would they be?
My backup drive, my iPod and my cat.
If you could have an endless supply of any food, what would you get?
I would soon lose all appetite no matter what it is. I want change.
If you're in an emo dip, what is it that can make the sun break thru the clouds, have you smile again and feel better?
Medications. The illegal kind. Or a kind word from a friend :-)
I'm looking for a life coach. And I'm done with God and my therapists. Can you recommend anyone?
Yourself! Stand your ground!
When I'm tired I cant be involved w/ peeps & events around me as much as I'd like to. Frustrating. Physically or mentally impaired people even miss out entire days of the buzz. If you were in their shoes, how would you deal w/ missing the action?
I use Google Reader to aggregate RSS feeds from various news websites and when I finally feel better, I skimp through the articles and read those that seem interesting. After all, from my experience, it seems that most of those news are not important at all!
What is mana? How can it decrease or increase?
Mana is the magical form of energy. You can get mana by chanting, performing rituals or by using icons that people are idolizing connected to you. When they stare at the icons or think about them or masturbate, you get mana. Mana is filling the Universe, but you need a way to capture it. Mana also comes from power words.
What inspired your tattoo, and in which year did you get it inked?
It was a month after I ingested cocaine for the first time. I never tried it since. When I ingested it I became extremely promiscuitive and had sex multiple times with three men and a woman in the same day, on the same cocaine party. I couldn't believe I have done it and I created this tattoo - a Salamander, dragon of fire, that would burn away my feelings of shame and being unsure of myself and shy. It's a animated primordial flame that banishes all my fears.
If you could choose to live in another country, which country would it be, and why?
The Netherlands! Because your laws and common practice about narcotics and generally about things like euthanasia, gay marriage are way more intelligent than Polish laws.
Dear RIOT GRRRL; how do you deal with your anger? If you had to lecture; what would be your anger management lesson 101?
I have problems with dealing with my anger. I beat people up and destroy things sometimes. It was more intensive when I was younger, but I'm still a firecracker. You tell me ;-)
Did you have imaginary friends when you were a child?
Yes. I still have them, only now I know who they really are, that is - demons. Demons don't have to be evil, you know :-)
@theNetherest I spread my wings / I check my fangs / Today I will / Decrease your ranks / You are my food / I am... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vk5nw
You were here before, couldn't look you in the eye, just like an angel, your skin makes me cry... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vk5ct
poniedziałek, 30 sierpnia 2010
@theNetherest @Benfranklin1 @aubrey_tweetuje Znowu narasta we mnie tęcza radości / Zatapia złe przeszłości wspom... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vipm5
czwartek, 26 sierpnia 2010
@theNetherest My fav Hole/Courtney Love song...It's simple and to the point. I *like* simplicity, not just myste... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vcm8m
@theNetherest For as long as the world will stay, even if it is for millions years, we will drink you blood and ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vcm1r
@theNetherest It's a band from Poland, besides the name :-] You should like it... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vclwx
@theNetherest I'm going for a walk. Here is an Enya song that tells a lot about me and Eris and Astarte and the ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vclsu
@theNetherest: "This IS indeed the most emo and harmony song of that album (Wages of Sin)" YES, I LOOK FOR BEA... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vclqr
@theNetherest Great way to wake up! I love bass on that song :-] Feeding...Tasty ;-] ♫ http://blip.fm/~vchf8
środa, 25 sierpnia 2010
@theNetherest @daycaretime Something has changed again, I look around in confusion, Something has snuffed the pa... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vb8qi
@theNetherest Like the spirit of the flame, holy fire burning in the earthly waters, what is a word but a name, ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vb5rq
@theNetherest Couldn't find a better version. Look for it, it's worth it :-) Covenant - Nexus Polaris ♫ http://blip.fm/~vb5fh
@theNetherest @arcsy My favorite Nightwish song. Have you heard Visions of Atlantis - Send Me a Light? That's an... ♫ http://blip.fm/~vb57o
wtorek, 24 sierpnia 2010
@theNetherest The weaver is like a song of the Lady of Shalott, hidden within innate dimensions of interwoven pa... ♫ http://blip.fm/~v9wg4
@theNetherest Sophia, a sacred whore, the perennial discord, the mantle of wisdom, the pure light... ♫ http://blip.fm/~v9w24
poniedziałek, 23 sierpnia 2010
@theNetherest I'm sitting here and the darkness envelops my frame // My eyes are hidden from the burning sun // ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~v8dpw
@theNetherest: "RACHEL YAMAGATA sounds like a mix of Fiona Apple and Norah Jones ♥ "I agree :-)" Have you heard ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~v8dg4
@theNetherest: "One of my favorite songs :-) Thanks!" ♥ Rachael Yamagata – I Want You" ♫ http://blip.fm/~v8apb
@theNetherest: "@agquarx Nocturnal bite... ♥ Siouxsie - Night Shift ♥ DAMN TASTY. I still not feel very good but... ♫ http://blip.fm/~v89w0
sobota, 21 sierpnia 2010
@theNetherest Blessing freely given, I shall gladly receive. Offering given with heart, thrice will return to th... ♫ http://blip.fm/~v54pb
A friend gives you a voucher for dinner in any restaurant you like. What would be your preferred cuisine?
Something new, some speciality of the restaurant. Something I have never eaten before. I always want to try all new things at least once :-].
Do you use incense to scent your home?
I am allergic to smoke and a lot of strong scents. I get asthma attacks. So no, I do not.
What do you do to relax before dropping off to sleep?
I listen to audiobooks. I buy them at Audible.com. It's the best place to buy audiobooks, period. My iPod has a setting to turn it off after a set period of time, for example 90 minutes. It will lower the volume gradually down and then turn the audiobook off when it's already very quiet, so you won't wake up if you are already sleeping. Sometimes I dream about the contents of the book, which is a lot of fun! :-)
Why would I want to remove my alarm clock from my bedroom?
Because it makes you nervous and think about passing time. You can't sleep, you look at the clock, it's 2, it's 2:30, it's 3, it's 3:30. You get nervous and your sleep is ruined. And alarm clocks are evil, you should wake up naturally, when you are in a correct sleep phase - it's when it is very easy to disturb your sleep and only sunlight will wake you up. It's not good to wake up forcefully from deep sleep. Besides if you wake up naturally, you will probably remember the dream you had and dreams are a wonderful thing! :-)
Some people skip breakfast in a hurry, some eat 7 times a day small portions to keep a constant energy level; how many meals a day to keep you happy? Any snacks in between?
Sometimes I skip breakfast, but it's only because I feel really so incredibly dreadful in the mornings that I sometimes want to stay in bed until dinner. I almost always eat dinner at about 13-15, largest meal of the day. Then I sometimes make myself some small cheese plus vegetables sandwiches or assorted fresh fruits and or vegetables -- that is, if I have them; and snack off this plate in small increments until I stop snacking at about 18-19. If I stay up later I usually only drink tea with sugar and lemon, carbonated water with or without a little bit of some fruit juice, no more snacks after 19. I rarely eat sweets or cakes and if I do I usually overindulge in them, like whole box of hard candy over the course of one evening ;-). I almost never eat chips and other "trash food". Sometimes I like to drink a glass of cold milk if I am particularly thirsty for milk that day.
piątek, 20 sierpnia 2010
What do you think is the main role for a woman in a Family?
What do you think is the main role for a woman in a Family?
@theNetherest Come inside my room and join me, your worst nightmare, come to me like a ram, for a slaughter...:-] ♫ http://blip.fm/~v3gpl
czwartek, 19 sierpnia 2010
@theNetherest Goodnight, mortal soul dear / Sleep well, while I dream alone / About things etheral and real / Ab... ♫ http://blip.fm/~v2obc
When I try to bypass blocked music site Last.FM at work, using free proxy server, I can't login to my account. It seems the login URL is too long. If I shorten with TinyURL, the short link does not work. Which free proxy server accepts long URLs?
Free proxy server lists can be found on the Internet. I won't give you a link because these lists change all the time. Just look for something like "free proxy server list" on Google or something similar. NEVER DO ANYTHING PRIVATE OVER UNKNOWN PROXY, controlled by party you don't know. It's fine for listening to Last.fm or watching Hulu, though. Or use Tor - google "download tor", you will get the Tor Project as first hit. Read the documentation before using Tor. HTH :-)
Do you believe in re-incarnation? Akasha records, choosing your parents and environmentto come to live in in this life?
Definitely NO. I don't believe in any kind of afterworld. It's this world that we need to care about and cherish it and love. In this world live people who need us and we need them to relate, to connect to Universe in a loving way, that improves it. Here and now. Not in some poke-in-the-nose place later. Now.
@theNetherest: "@agquarx [She stretched and yawned, opened her eyes to check what reality she had spawned] ♥ LOR... ♫ http://blip.fm/~v2dis
wtorek, 17 sierpnia 2010
If you had access to a time machine, where and when would be the first place you travel to?
The Burning Times. I would save all those innocent women burned at the stake as "wytches".
Would you consider bipolar disorder an advantage when exploring altered states of consciousness?
No. Sometimes it's too much at the same time. I got psychotic few times.
@theNetherest I'm FOUNTAIN OF BLOOD, in the SHAPE of a girrrl...[I absolutely adore the song and it's lyrics, pl... ♫ http://blip.fm/~uzdzw
@theNetherest You are my food, dear / I feed on your mortal words / But have no fear / I'll sing you seraphic ch... ♫ http://blip.fm/~uzdph
poniedziałek, 16 sierpnia 2010
@theNetherest Thank you for the music you share / And for the concern about my welfare / It's almost too much, c... ♫ http://blip.fm/~uxg3z
@theNetherest: "@agquarx ♥ Eagles – Witchy Woman" :-))) Milk and kisses! ♫ http://blip.fm/~uxagf
@theNetherest: "@agquarx I'm sure your ♥ sings when you hear these harp strings.. ♥ Mabon - Omnia" ♫ http://blip.fm/~ux9c3
If you go see a movie; what genre is your preferred choice; drama. comedy, action or horror? And what title would you go to see at this time in that genre?
I don't have preferred genres, but the genre I most dislike is most action movies. They are so predictable. I loved "Underworld", "Dracula", "Twilight" series, anything with Winona Ryder in it, anything based on novels by Philip K Dick. I like science-fiction a lot. And *some* romances. Most recent comedies give me creeps and are not funny to me. I don't watch horror movies any more, I used to watch them a lot.
Shower or bath?
Bath. I love dissolving myself in scented water. With candles. And a book. And some music.
Do you have an e-reader? If so, what are your experiences? If not, would you buy one now or wait until the battle of formats has produced a winner?
The battle of formats has already produced a winner - it's ePub. I don't own a reader yet, but plan to buy one soon. But not just a dedicated reader, an iPad.
Is your tattoo of the magickal salamander your only one? Are you considering getting more tattoos in the future?
I was considering a tribal or flower design around my wrist. Or not. The salamander is right now the only one. I'm not that much into body modifications as you have probably guessed :-)
sobota, 14 sierpnia 2010
What can I do against insomnia?
They say GHB is good short-term ;-). If you avoid drugs, the only thing I can advice is to try to RELAX and REMOVE THE ALARM CLOCK from your bedroom.
What do you think of cloud computing vs. Local software and resources? Any good / bad experiences?
Don't trust free services to always be free. Backup your data locally, even if you store it in the cloud. What if for some reason you can't pay a monthly payment and they delete your data? Avoid anything that has micro$oft written on it, or DRM (digital restrictions management). They can pull it down any time without notice. They did it before.
Can you give me a Recreational Drugs 101 to educate teenagers or unknowing adults?
1. Know your body. Never take a lot of a substance you have never tried before. Begin with very small dose, see if you are not allergic to it for example. 2. Know your substance. Read about the substance you are going to take, preferably from reliable sources like Erowid.org. Read various sources just to be sure. Compare what people say, don't just read one post from some punk and that's it. 3. Know your source. Don't just trust street dealers. Don't trust anyone just because, they might have best intentions but no real knowledge. Think for yourself. Buy from labs directly, even if it means times four the price. Avoid taking pills of unknown origin and make, you don't know what they contain, they could kill you if you are not careful. Better buy pure substances in crystalline form and dose them yourself with a good electronic scale and gel capsules. NEVER SNORT OR INJECT UNKNOWN SUBSTANCES. Better avoid snorting or injecting altogether. 4. Buy from chemical labs directly whenever you can. 5. Buy yourself a simple chemical toolkit for testing drugs and test them every time you buy a new thing for presence of dangerous additives if the source is unreliable and even if it is reliable, if you CAN make up a test. To know how to test, read about it in reliable sources. Simple reactions are easy to perform for everyone. 6. Never mix substances if you don't know what you are doing. Never drink alcohol with other drugs, just in case it might prove fatal. Never take another dose just because you feel like the previous one doesn't do anything, wait for the next day and take more THEN. If you take substances that are new or not well researched, make a week of a break before you increase the dose. 7. And generally, THINK BEFORE YOU DO SOMETHING :-)
My iTunes library takes too much space on my PC’s hard drive. I want to move it to an external HD. How do I make sure that iTunes recognizes the library has moved next time I purchase music? Change the default import path? Or by Home Sharing?
You can always do Library/Consolidate Library to make sure all data is stored in iTunes directory after you add your songs from the external drive. This should teach iTunes to store all data in new location. New songs should be stored there. I hope.
I use hotmail.com / live.com Skydrive to store data online and Dropbox to synchronize and share. How safe are these services against hacking and phishing?
I don't know about Skydrive, but I wouldn't trust micro$oft ;-) with anything really important. Just look at the security of their Windows product ;-). Dropbox on the other hand is very secure. I think you can be kind-of secure with Skydrive too, just remember to choose a good, hard to guess password, at least 12-15 characters long, with alphanumerics (upper and lower case letters) and numbers. This will give you about 5.6 bits of entropy per character. Should be enough. Don't use words that can be found in the dictionary, don't use facts from your life to form password (like your dog's name or your birthday). If memorizing a totally random pass phrase is hard for you, use for example n-th (for example, third) letters of each word from a passage from a book or a song you love. If you'll make your password in a secure way and always connect using Secure Sockets Layer (SSL, like https://) when logging in, you should be fine. Unless you have a key logger installed by some malicious party on your Windows machine ;-). Always practice safe hex! :-)
Formspring or Society.me? =P
Formspring.me has about ten hundred better design and usability than Society.me! On the other hand, Society.me has this ability to list keywords you want to be asked about and the questions are distributed among the "society", so many people have chance to answer. They are just different. I wish the Society.me people hired a web designer or sth...I guess you should ask "@me" questions on Formspring.me.
Sugar, artificial sweetener or honey?
Sugar or honey ONLY. I simply HATE artificial sweeteners, they taste is such chemical-metallic way...I never use them.
What you prefer working on; PC or laptop? And do you prefer mouse or mouse pad?
My laptop is at the moment out of order, so I have to use my desktop Mac. Mac is not a PC ;-). I prefer mouse to touchpad, but the new "magic" touchpad from Apple (I don't own it yet) and the new Magic Mouse with touch surface are very nice :-).
Are you a morning Grrrl or night Grrrl?
I generally feel better at night. The closer to the evening, the better I feel.
Bottled water or tap water?
Tap water only after boiling, for black tea with sugar and lemon. Bottled water because I can make it freezing cold and it's fizzly :-).
@theNetherest Pressed to surf the wavelets of probability / I receive stochastic replies / Reaching black hole o... ♫ http://blip.fm/~uubr4
@theNetherest: "@agquarx ♥ Paramore – Crush crush crush [Live] on a red♥head" redheads ♫ http://blip.fm/~uubg3
@theNetherest: "@agquarx: Okrzyki ! A toast to all the ancient and modern knowledge you hold inside ♠Beltain–Dr... ♫ http://blip.fm/~uub1r
@theNetherest "It's music" - Oh, I hear it again and everything goes away, I look 4 words, but they're gone, Is ... ♫ http://blip.fm/~uuayt
@theNetherest "TY" means To You, right? TY! I simply LOVE LOVE LOVE the lyrics :-) And the original song too. ♫ http://blip.fm/~uuame
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